 |
| Photo Credit |
I used to hate marigolds. To me they were reminiscent of
flowers that are considered weeds in Florida, like Lantana. In my mind they were
cheap fillers for my mom’s flower bed. Not that attractive at all considering
they only came in yellow and orange hues.
But all that changed in 2008. Easter came early that year
and forever changed my feelings about spring. As a native Floridian, I thought of spring as the season that the weather grew hot before it grew really hot. But for the first time in
spring of 2008 I discovered the pain and beauty of death and new life.
Unless you’re new here you know I lost my first husband on
March 22, 2008. He was in a motorcycle accident on Leap Day in which he
sustained a serious head injury. That injury left him in a coma for three weeks
before he went to his forever home on the other side of eternity.
So now I find myself five years later and this journey is
nothing like I expected. I feel like Darryl’s been gone just a short time. Two
years perhaps? But that’s not the case at all. I’d always thought that I’d be
further down the road of grief at this point but I’m not. If I’m honest with myself,
I’m only just beginning. I thought by now I would be ready for some
glorious five-year memorial where we bring family and friends together to
reflect on the beauty of Darryl’s life. But friends, right now that sounds like
torture.
I have learned just a couple things about grief over the
past five years that I’d like to share with you:
- Grief is necessary. It must be experienced in all its stages. (I’m sorry to say it’s taken me much too long to learn this one.)
- Grief is unpredictable. You can't do it right or wrong. There’s scary freedom in that.
In 2008, Easter came the earliest it had in nearly 100
years, on March 23. Needless to say this timing also affected my view of Jesus'
death and resurrection. And oh what a joy it is to know that not only did Jesus
rise for us to be reunited with him but he made a way for all of us to live
again. What comfort, what peace, what joy can be found in the hope of seeing
believers who have gone before us again in eternity.
And now? I try to plant marigolds every spring. They were Darryl's favorite flower.
Do you have a story of grief you would share with me? I
would be so honored to hear from you in the comments below.
